For Aaisha, it has been a long arduous journey, a decade full of trials and memories of a man who did not love her or their four children. Alhamdulillah she’s reached a safe haven: a safe haven within herself as she maintains that eternal bond with Allah, a bond that no man will ever sever.
But it’s been a tumultuous abyss that she’s had to climb out of, stretching out her hand, gingerly and fervently, to grasp the Rope of Allah that would rein her into safer, calmer shores. This, too, would have been virtually impossible if it had not been for the women at Solace UK, who threw her an illuminous brand and said: “Sister, we’re here for you…you can do this…don’t give in to what he did to you…rise up and take charge…Allah is with you.” She grabbed the light and with it the unrelenting support, and she’s now standing tall, alhumdulillah.
Yet, not so long before, there had been a cold grey vacancy that consumed her as a woman and as a mother. Her eldest daughter had felt the brunt of the abuse and neglect, and churned out such misbehaviour that she spent a year in foster care. For Aisha to be away from her child and see how tormented she was, only added to her low self-esteem. Being a Muslim for so many years now, she knew that bad times come to everyone, and that indeed Allah tests those whom He loves, yet being alone with three other children and no external support meant she saw the dark side of desperation rising within her. Alhamdulillaah, her faith was alive, because no matter how much abuse she had taken from her husband, she did not let it define her. She was better than the chiding, the shouting and the humiliation. To believe in yourself only a little, even a shadow of a fraction, is hope and to have hope is to know that Allah will flourish that belief in ways you could not imagine…
Solace gave her recommendations, referrals and reassurance; they provided support, guidance and growth; were there with emails, texts, video calls.
Using the support offered by Solace, this broken woman built herself up into a wholeness that meant she was putting into practice all the courses of well-being and positive parenting that Solace had recommended. Her daughter finally returned home and Aisha was whole again: a strong mum raising and nurturing her four children to the best of her ability, planting the seeds of faith and emaan in them, as she grew herself.
It has not been easy and it’s still difficult on some days, but being a single mum is a challenge only given to those can bear it. She reads the verse from the Quran: “Allah does not burden a soul beyond what it can bear…” (2:286) and it realigns her thinking. She’s grateful for the blessings she has and her new job revives her with a sense of determination to be the best Muslim mum to her children. She’s grateful for the practical advice Solace UK gave her: from seeking a job to writing applications. Her weekly chats with the team at Solace UK ensure she can tap into the professional and caring advice on offer and also express her challenges to caring, non-judgmental listeners.
Solace UK has been a lifeline to her. She’s ready to make full use of the new life that’s in front of her. Solace UK has shown her that a Muslim woman can reclaim her own life and trajectory, that such a woman need not be stuck in the shadows of a wretched man’s misuse and abuse of her. Time has healed some pain and some pain still lingers but she knows that Allah will help her.
“If Allah helps you, none can overcome you…” (3:160)
When you donate to Solace, sisters like Aaisha can have the support they need to raise the next generation of Muslims without the baggage of emotional trauma.
On this Ramadan, plant the seed of giving regularly by becoming a regular donor, make a donation, or give your zakat to make a difference to the upbringing of the next generation of Muslims, to make sure they grow up with the support they need to keep them in the Deen, and to grow up healthy and happy doing so.
I want to make a difference: https://givesolace.uk/behersolace
The Revert Stories are in aid of Solace UK’s “Be Her Solace” campaign, which are 8 simple ways you can give our revert sisters solace in Ramadan. Follow along at https://staging.solaceuk.org/revertstories
- Be a Monthly Donor
- Make a Single Donation
- Help Build Services
- Donate your Zakat
- Sponsor a Mum and Her Children
- Sponsor a Revert Sister
- Sponsor a Will
- Give an Eid Gift
Disclaimer: These stories are derived from multiple real stories to depict real-life events and circumstances experienced by revert sisters. While the stories are based on real-life events, none of the stories belong or refer to one particular person. Full anonymity and confidentiality has been upheld in the writing of Revert Stories. Solace takes the privacy of its service users seriously. All names, characters, locations and events have been changed.
This Revert Story was written by Zaynab Dawood.